Monday, November 23, 2009

Herein lies the Saga


Fair was the morning, but dark was the day that brought doom upon us. Lo, it had been foretold by the seven winds to Gromnil the Skjald, that the morning of Three Bright Stars would herald a moment of destiny.

Gromnil proclaimed that upon this day, a great king from days long past would return, bringing with him ships and weapons of war, weapons forged in the hell hot fires of our enemy's darkest fears. Young Skaerlas went to the edge of the gray woods, and thereupon did he see the return of King Glaumnisson, astride a White-Maned Beast, which snarled and growled as it trod upon the ancient grounds of our ancestors.

Skaerlas called for the horns to sound, and called for the men to gather their gifts of tribute and prepare to hail the new king, when it happened. The Three Bright Stars shone down, and about the feet of Glaumnisson's beast, the Njaerdling, there was a mist which left the ground frozen in its wake.

More and more of the lands of our fathers was covered in this mist, and it seemed that the breath of Fenris was upon us, for then, Skaerlas beheld the Glaumnisson's host.

Behind the Njaerdling, armed with weapons of the stuff of nightmares and madness, they marched. Our ancestors, unliving, with eyes that screamed from the blackest depths of the night, They fell upon our town, and shattered the kingly tribute that had been gathered.

The winds howled and the beasts roared terribly, but though they were fearsome, we won BECAUSE WE SHOT THEM WITH OUR MIGHTY LASER BEAMS BECAUSE WE ARE ACTUALLY A HIGHLY ADVANCED SOCIETY! IN YOUR FACE!!!!! BOO-YAH! YEAH! LASERS! THAT'S RIGHT!!!



ALSO WE HAVE LASER SHARKS!!!!

THAT'S RIGHT! SUCK IT UNDEAD GHOST MONSTER VIKING ANCESTORS! LASER SHARKS IN YOUR FACE!!!?!!1!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

What did you saaay?! Your face was asking!

For your amusement, and also mine, the 50 worst video game voice acting things.

Among my favorites:

"Please don't kill me, but I suppose you have to!"

"Now withstand my arctic blast!"

"Interested in my body?" "No." "Oh, you're into that." "I like girls, but today, it's about Justice."

"Yesterday is today's history and blaghraugfesifhufigawyagf"

I seem to have lost a little gray matter there. Anyway, watch on...

Friday, November 13, 2009

Hooray! Space!

In case you haven't heard, they found water on the moon. This is amazing, and not just because it's a potential resource for humanity and any moon base we might wish to establish (albeit at the cost of a bloody man-machine-space gorilla war), but because it means that here is some strong material evidence for the exploration of space.

It's theorized that water might actually form on the moon in an endogenic process from an interaction between solar winds and moon rocks. Something to do with charged hydrogen breaking apart oxygen bonds in the soil and creating trace amounts of water/ice. Here is something which doesn't happen on Earth, but at the same time is in reach.

Who knows what might be discovered on the other planets in our Solar System? Or beyond even the furthest reaches of our own Sun?

I have always been fascinated by the prospect of exploring space. Ever since we learned about it in elementary school, the idea's been emblazoned in my mind. I don't know if I'll ever be an astronaut, but someday, I'd like to go beyond the Earth. Someday, I'd like Mankind to reach out for the stars, and to know them, to understand the cosmos.

I believe that understanding is the key to our future, to the galaxy's even, if you think of it as one big organism. It's been said that we are a mechanism for the cosmos to know itself.

I'm inclined to agree.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Where now, and to what end?

Quick update:

The writing process is coming along full speed ahead.

Cracked.com is the devil.

New zombie articles soon.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

It was Carl Sagan's birthday a while back

I can't believe I had forgotten.

Carl Sagan
was one of my heroes. He told stories about the universe, and our place in it. He made the unknowable seem wondrous, and the vastness of space seem filled with delicate joy.

In his writings, science and poetry come together, and the universe is a beautiful place to be.

From Cosmos to Contact, I admire them all.

Here's one last little thing to think about.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Games I aim to try

The title says it all. These are a number of games I'd like to play, ranging from board games to video games. As I've got some considerable free time regarding a gaming schedule at the moment, I'm compiling a list of all the ones I want to try. Games marked with * indicate I want to play this in as fancy-pants a manner as possible.

Board Games:
Role-Playing Games:
Video Games:
Now if only I had some kind of time machine, so all of these could be out now, and I'd have the time to play them.

Monday, November 9, 2009

I have had some serious sci-fi on the brain lately

This is likely because the novel attempt I am making is a science fiction story. I've been rereading a lot of my favorite stories in this vein, because I'm of the belief that much as milk smells like what it's been next to in the refrigerator so too is the writing style influenced by what has been read recently.

It is my hope that it'll help me get past writing the first chapter, which is about where I am stuck at the moment. I keep going back and redoing the beginning. I keep telling myself that I should press on and write some more, but it's a habit I picked up writing papers. I've found that once I get going on a topic, I can keep going, the words and ideas just fall into place.

But without that solid beginning, I don't really have anyplace to go. So for now, I have written the first couple of pages over once or twice. I find myself staring down a blank page. But no fear, I shall prevail.

Timeline restored.

Reinitializing reality.

Data corruption detected, backup systems coming online.

Error: backup systems offline.

Attempting reality restore.

Restore complete. Initialize Y/N?l

Space/time causality error detected.

Preparing for temporal restabilization.

Please, evacuate sector 3.

Please, evacuate sector 4.

Prepare for restabilization.

Temporal anomaly isolated.

Restabilization imminent.

Please do not^#H!ND,.1.094-09818(*398

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Prepare to face my fury!

I have traveled back from the future to deliver this message: your doom is at hand! Prepare for fury the likes of which you've not seen before. Quickly, before it is too late, develop an unstoppable technique, or failing that, a style that cannot be bested by anyone.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Hah! Employment!

I have a job now. My job, such as it is, consists on covering zombies in Austin. Now, mind you, I'm not real sure that I've ever seen zombies in Austin, outside of maybe one or two philosophical zombies, but as we all know, that's just the old "I'm only ever sure of my own consciousness" argument, but sexed up with the living dead. The dinosaurs agree with me on this one, so again, not sure.

But I'm going to keep making stuff up until they tell me to stop, so it should be totally awesome. Also, in the process, I'm learning about Search Engine Optimization, creating easier to read articles, and how to avoid some journalistic pitfalls. Bet you wish I had a link for that one.

Me too.

Anyway, that's it for now. Time to celebrate my being published. On the internet. Hooray!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Prepare to meet your doom!

There are some phrases that everyone should have the opportunity to say in their life. Some opportunity in which it's appropriate that anyone be saying these things. For example, saying, "Gentlemen... BEHOLD!" and then unveiling a bowl of cereal doesn't carry the same weight as the same phrase but unveiling a death ray.







Which would you rather unveil?


Actually, now that I think about it, it would be kind of awesome to unveil a bowl of cereal like that. It's worth trying in the name of science, which brings me to the next phrase on the list of awesome stuff to say:

"FOR SCIENCE!"

Because sometimes you need to have a reason to do whatever you are about to do. So you should announce it in the name of SCIENCE! For example, whenever the people at CERN are about do do, I don't know, anything, I am certain that their employees probably shout the reason they are doing this.

Now, as you may know, the Large Hadron Collider over at CERN has had a great deal of trouble in the past. People were worried it might create a black hole and kill us all. While that would be a terrible tragedy, it would have given at least one scientist to utter...

"You insolent fool! You've doomed us all!"

While the potential destruction of the planet is certainly one of the most fitting examples, there are plenty of opportunities to say this in a grave, if melodramatic voice. Mind you, don't go overdoing it. Nobody cares if someone burned the coffee. Unless doing so breaks the LHC, in which case, it's all yours.

That's all I dare post for now, lest the concentrated power of these phrases tear my computer asunder, unleashing their awesome might. No, the world is not yet ready for this.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

There is this club that I think you should join

Picture this:

It is midnight and the woods are quiet. Only the sounds of crickets disturb the chill air of the night. Moonlight illuminates the mist coiling on the ground, and an ill wind blows. Suddenly a murder of crows takes flight, and you know in your heart that the hour of destiny is at hand! Slowly you turn towards the encroaching darkness of the forest and face your foe. With a clash of steel and an exalted shout, the battle begins.

This is what it is like to be a member of the Midnight Samurai Dueling Club. You too can experience this feeling of total awesomeness.

It is important to follow the rules though, lest you dishonor yourself and your ancestors.

  1. Tell Freaking EVERYBODY about Midnight Samurai Dueling Club, because it's awesome.
  2. Don't actually try and hurt anyone. Samurai Duels are all about the shouting and the running around and honoring your ancestors and getting revenge for what that insolent dog has done/retrieving your clan's family sword.
  3. Honor above all else!
  4. Shout loudly! Do not be afraid to call your attacls!
  5. Be Awesome to your Foe.
That's it! Following these simple rules will prepare you for your very own Midnight Duel.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

What's that make us?



N
Looking at the different heroes in some of my favorite shows, I've realized something. I really really like it when they are heroic because they choose to be, rather than being forced to do the right thing. It gives their heroics much more meaning. Consider: in the episode Jaynestown, of the show Firefly, Jayne is revered as a hero by the mudders. Initially he revels in their worship, but as the show goes on, you get to see how affected he is by the tale of his heroism. He knows full well that their story isn't true, but when push comes to shove he fights for them anyhow, because it's what he feels is right. It makes the conflicting emotions he's feeling the more viable to have them be in his control, allowing Jayne to develop more fully as a character, instead of a victim of circumstances.

I love that kind of thing. I've even had the opportunity to play a character like that once. His name was Balasar Vel, a Half-Elf Paladin who wanted nothing more than to be a knight out of legend. He wanted to show people that they could shape their own destiny, they just had to want to. He is easily my most favorite character, and was a blast to play. I found I never had any problem taking part in the game. If I needed motivation, it was easy to draw on, which gave me the freedom to choose how to be affected by events. Also, if there was ever a shortness of something to do, it was easy to figure out where to go next, because the character's drive was to be a hero. It was totally sweet.

What other kind of heroics appeal to you guys?

Monday, November 2, 2009

D'awww

One last video update, and then on to some thoughts on heroism and such. But first...

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Are you looking for a challenge?!?!!


It seems fitting that the Day of the Dead is also the month that a challenge is issued to the people of America: write a novel in a month. What constitutes a novel? 50,000 words or more, presumably put together in a coherent fashion, if not spelled correctly.

The idea is that anyone can write a novel, they simply have to try, laying word after word as a bricklayer might in order to construct first a wall, then a grand manor. You don't need to make a poignant commentary on civilization, this challenge is all about getting something done. It's about expressing yourself and overcoming your fears. Most importantly, it is about accomplishment.

It often takes time for us to see the fruits of our labors, especially so for some jobs, but this contest is the opportunity to get something done for yourself. There is a pride that comes in having accomplished something, moreso if it's something you've been meaning to do, but never had the gumption to.

So this is it, the chance of a lifetime, the chance to endure despite school, work, and life. Even if you don't decide to try, it gets you thinking.
If you wrote a novel, what would it be about?